Reader Question:
we met a man online who life 500 kilometers out. He is 34 and I’m 53. He performed let me know he had a woman he dated “locally” and this he had been merely on the site looking buddies. Three months later on we knew there is feelings per different.
At the same time, the guy still indicates he is experiencing difficulity together with gf, who isn’t some body he is “dating” in your area. He’s living with the lady and they’ve been collectively for four years.
At long last determined we had to fulfill to see if it was worth seeking. The guy gave me the primary reason the guy did not believe it absolutely was straight to do so while he had been along with her. I finally offered him an ultimatum and informed him I couldn’t play next fiddle. The guy professed their really love but said he had been really puzzled.
Perform we offer him ultimatum, it is their or me? Have always been we wrong to inquire about him in order to make that decision?
-Nancy (Fl)
Dr Wendy Walsh’s Answer:
Oh Nancy, Nancy, Nancy! You penned to me for sincerity, correct? Really, are you sitting down? Because here arrives a honey cooking pot of fact.
You may be staying in dream area, my personal dear girl. You’ve not also came across this person exactly who may be one and which may or may not have a girlfriend.
We very suggest you can see the documentary “Catfish” (available on iTunes and Netflix) about an on-line really love con.
But even although you don’t do this, let’s assume for a moment he’s really which he states they are and ignore the fact he started composing to you by sleeping about their connection standing.
Let’s just look at the alleged details.
A.) He’s almost twenty years more youthful than you.
B.) He’s in a serious relationship.
C.) The guy said right away he is merely trying to be pals.
Thus I ask you to answer, precisely why are you willing to risk your cardiovascular system on these types of a bad choice?
Practical question really should not be about giving him an ultimatum, but rather, in the event you give yourself the really love you are entitled to?
If so, subsequently that isn’t the pony you will want to ride in to the sunset with. Operate, girl!
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